So I'm 33 and feeling okay about that. It's been a long time since I came on here; mostly wanting to but struggling to assemble my thoughts, let alone making them interesting to read (or even write down). But I can list things today, on my way to chemo (hard, when you know it's no longer working well and so much more is on the way) but I have photos from a mad variety of events in August to flick through and keep my spirits up. In the last month I've -
*been to the theatre twice for the recently released part of Harry Potter follow-up productions, and Aladdin the musical. Both well exceeded my expectations and were well worth the large sums paid (!).
*ridden in a helicopter, bucket-list style. And would like to go again over a different place, perhaps a coastline next time? On this occasion it was from Redhill (just outside the M25) into London and down the Thames to Greenwich. Surprisingly vibration-y as opposed to bouncy or shaky as I expected from flying in normal planes.
*swam in the sea for three first time in over a year and properly for the first time in three now that my shoulder is so much better. Graceful didn't come into it, nor any real strokes, but my confidence in returning to a pool has...
Add 'returning to regular pool visits' to my to-do list.
*afternoon tea at the Ritz with my female sides of the family for my sister's 50th
*spent a weekend away for a wedding which was lovely and quite enjoyed wearing the dress (don't tell mum)
*visited and fed the tigers (under close surveillance, not randomly) at Woburn Safari Park with friends, got chased by one in a land-rover (we were, not the tiger) made friends with the birds that you can buy food for so that they come and land on you
*giggled a lot more than I would have expected to, the last time I was here or even a few weeks before, when I was given six months to live.
Yep, there's always a cancer update. Let's list again;
*Kadcyla isn't working well any more - my liver is quiet but I have a new couple of lung 'nodules' and a recurrence/new breast tumour near the site of the original one (which is still growing). Ah! And my right thigh bone, right shoulder and brains are all looking worse.
*therefore - changing to a trial chemo soon, need to have a stable brain before I can be switched since it is on trial still. Gamma knife radiotherapy at Barts & The London (near St Paul's) being planned for late September.
*radiotherapy on the new breast tumour will start in the planning stages next week - I'm pissed off about this as it's very palpable now and it's the first time I've had a lump I can FEEL any time I touch that location. It's too wrapped up in muscle for surgery at this stage, although if the radiotherapy doesn't work I've decided I'll look into a double mastectomy as it really is upsetting me.
*one the above are done, I guess the new chemo will be paired again with Zometa (for my bones) to keep them a little under control, although I'm starting to feel like I'm a danger to myself walking around practically brittle-boned with the increasing mets and therefore all the time heightening the chances of a break. Horrible.
